


in my o(pi)nion (you're pretty cute)

by rurutan



Category: JO1 (Japan Band), Produce 101 (Japan TV)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, One Shot, Strangers to Lovers, chef!sho, lowkey nsfw humor, mention of junkeigo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:42:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25737469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rurutan/pseuds/rurutan
Summary: “you’re telling me you can cut this onion without tearing up when you can’t even crack an egg properly?”-single chef!sho meets musician!ruki on tinder, not knowing that ruki is also the guy named 'whiteprince' who posts ludicrous articles on a bachelor group chat.
Relationships: Shiroiwa Ruki/Yonashiro Sho
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	in my o(pi)nion (you're pretty cute)

just as yonashiro sho was about to finish deleting the last “cursed tiktok” off his account, a notification popped up on his phone. sho didn’t even have to look at it to know who it came from; he had recently joined a group chat for single, gay men to mingle and there was this guy named ‘whiteprince’ who constantly sent news articles and videos to the group like he was a mom of three kids. most of the stuff ‘whiteprince’ sent was complete bullcrap. who in the right mind would believe an article claiming “you won’t cry while chopping onions if you drink a raw egg yolk beforehand?” despite having gone to culinary school, sho didn’t bother responding to the messages, as the last thing he wanted was to get into an online fight with someone else.

speaking of food, sho decided to shift gears and go grocery shopping after viewing the nonsensical posts. even though sho was the head chef at a high-end restaurant, he was unmotivated when it came to preparing food for himself; as soon as his refrigerator emptied, he would order takeout for five days straight because there was something about supermarkets he disliked. initially, he used an app designed to let other people shop and deliver food to him, but he immediately ceased his usage of it after finding out how much of a toll it was taking on his bank account due to the expensive delivery fee. 

while waiting in the long checkout line, sho checked his phone and found himself browsing through tinder. his cousin, kono junki, recommended it to sho after finding out sho was single at the age of 24. sho got the app as a joke, but when junki announced he was getting married to sato keigo, a guy he met on tinder, sho started to take the app more seriously. sho’s friends joked about him being the human version of goldilocks when it came to selecting a partner, but they weren’t wrong; sho was searching for a guy who was “just right” for him, and his experience from rejecting dishes which were ‘too sweet’ or ‘a tad bit too salty’ in the kitchen certainly didn’t help with his picky antics. the guys he had seen so far didn’t resonate with his taste; one guy’s hair was “too brown and looked unnatural with his eyebrows'' while another male’s tattoo position was uncentered, bothering sho’s perfectionist mindset. 

however, sho shouldn’t have spoken too early, because the next guy that popped up on his screen looked godly. the dirty-blonde haired boy pictured in front of him was named shiroiwa ruki, and was an aspiring artist who spent his time composing songs. sho swore he was wooed even more by ruki based on ruki’s interests, because sho was also involved in the musical community; in his freetime, he sometimes went out and busked downtown. sho’s mouth almost dropped after he saw that ruki and him were a match, meaning ruki had swiped right on sho as well. 

“how could he like me?” sho wondered.

his impulses caused him to make the first move by messaging ruki. sho hoped he wouldn’t screw himself over. asking junki wouldn’t be a great idea, because that boy had too many ideas in his head. 

yonasho: hey  
yonasho: you’ve plucked my heartstrings ;)

in the midst of typing his next message, sho received a new message from the group chat he was in. the user ‘whiteprince’ was back at it again, causing sho to lose his train of thought. 

yonasho: you’re kinda cute  
yonasho: [UNSENT] no no no i didn’t mean to type that PLEASE DON’T SEND!! this is all whiteprince’s fault i literally h*te his guts

almost immediately after the last message, sho received a response from ruki.

officialruki: i could say the same for you  
officialruki: you know...the guitar isn’t the only thing i can finger well

although sho wasn’t having a face-to-face conversation, he could still feel the tips of his ears heat up. sho had always thought he was the expert at flirting jokingly with people, but it seemed like ruki usurped the position from sho. he considered getting advice from junki, but junki would tell sho to talk dirty back to ruki.

yonasho: looking forward to experiencing your fingering abilities  
yonasho: teach me your ways  
yonasho: jkjk not so fast!! anyways, how are you today?

sho chided himself for not being able to respond to ruki’s pickup line and for changing the subject. hearing a throat clear behind him, sho was not aware the checkout line had progressed. he could feel his phone vibrating in his pocket multiple times during the process, and was afraid ruki would lose interest in him if he didn’t respond fast enough. as soon as he exited, he checked his phone, only to be met with more articles being sent through the group chat. the titles of the posts were so absurd that sho laughed at the the link the user ‘whiteprince’ sent titled “WHY WATER IS UNHEALTHY: A THREAD.” sho took a screenshot of the chat and reminded himself to send it to ruki later to inform him about the clown in the chat.

over the course of the next few days, sho and ruki’s positions switched, with ruki being the one who was texting first. they mainly communicated with each other during the wee hours of the night, when both of them were unable to sleep. their messages revolved around the musical realm, although they sometimes had debates over weird food combinations. however, none of them expressed interest in meeting each other and sho didn’t dare to ask ruki to come over to the restaurant he worked at after hearing about ruki’s financial situation. their conversation had been flowing so smoothly, and sho didn’t want to be friendzoned through text. he went to his cousin as a last resort, who told him to “man up!” and to “just do it!” like he was the ambassador of nike. 

after work, sho ended up on the streets with his guitar, wanting to take his mind off of ruki. he headed downtown to his favorite spot next to a small fountain and started strumming away at it. young girls and boys had begun to crowd around him with some even living him a small tip. sho gazed into the distance, when he noticed a red-haired guy walking next to a dirty-blonde haired guy whom he swore was ruki. for a split-second, sho swore he saw ruki turn around and grin at him before continuing to chat with the red-haired boy. he was having delusional thoughts, but when his phone lit up with a message from ruki, his mind went awry as he tried to continue with his piece without getting distracted. 

officialruki: hey sexy  
officialruki: not gonna lie but  
officialruki: you tune me on  
yonasho: i still can’t believe i saw you today  
yonasho: wanna...you know…  
yonasho: hang out sometime?  
officialruki: i mean i don’t really have anything to do today  
officialruki: wanna come over to my place?

according to sho, the “date” was scheduled in the blink of an eye, and time elapsed by quicker than ever. sho was having an existential crisis trying to pick out a proper outfit for him to wear and wondered if it was appropriate to dress up in a suit for a simple dinner with a guy he had never seen before. he ended up choosing the safest option: a plain white shirt and blue jeans that made him look like a mom.

his heart was racing as he was driving over to ruki’s place, due to the surge of messages popping up on his phone. when he arrived, he noticed only one of the messages was from ruki, while the others were from ‘whiteprince' about the proper way to place a churro in a pan. coincidentally, the aroma radiating from the apartment number he was heading to was that of churros. sho could hear shuffling behind the door as he knocked on it. 

“hey,” ruki smiled as he opened the door, “dinner preparation is taking longer than i expected. why don’t you first come in and chill out in the living room?”

“do you need any help?” sho inquired, “you know, i’m the h-,”

“head chef of hajime? i’ll tell you if i need any assistance.”

sho couldn’t stop staring at ruki’s movements inside of the kitchen and sho was worried for ruki because ruki was doing everything wrong. 

“i’m almost done!” ruki exclaimed.

“are you sure you don’t need any help?” sho reiterated, watching ruki jump back as the egg shell fell into the bowl he was attempting to crack his eggs into.

to sho’s horror, ruki sucked up the yolk with an empty water bottle, placed it into a mug, and drank it down. he then proceeded to the fridge, where he took out two onions.

“ruki, what do you think you’re doing?” sho started.

“i’m cutting onions. didn’t you know that drinking raw egg yolks will prevent you from crying while chopping onions?”

“you’re telling me you can cut this onion without tearing up when you can’t even crack an egg properly?” sho remarked.

“wait a minute,” sho continued, “are you the one who has been sending all this fake news to the bachelor group? YOU’RE WHITEPRINCE?”

“would you be surprised if i told you i was?” ruki smirked.

“no…? well, either way you’re in for a wild ride tonight.” 

“i wouldn’t be lying if i said i was thrilled for it.” 

♡

since their initial date, sho had been coming over to ruki’s house consistently; his intentions ranged from teaching ruki how to cook to making out with ruki on the couch. one day, sho used ruki’s secret key to enter his apartment to surprise him for their eight month anniversary. he was preparing the first meal they had together: hamburgers coupled with churros. sho was met with a back hug just as he was about to chop the onions for the burgers. 

“hey sexy,” ruki whispered into his ear, “did you remember to drink your egg yolk before cutting the onion? i’d hate to see you cry tonight.”

sho rolled his eyes.

“are you an onion? because you’re making me tear up by reminding me about the crazy articles you sent to the group chat prior to meeting me. thank god you stopped,” sho retorted.

“you know what? i’m not hungry anymore.” 

“wait why?”

“because i’m going to eat you out tonight, mr. five-star chef. happy eight months!”

**Author's Note:**

> hi!! i hope you enjoyed my attempt at writing a slightly humorous yonaruki au!! follow me on twt (@jo1stargazer) if u want :)


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